Enough already:
- Middleton and Kardashian pregnancies. I'm very happy for them and wish them both the best - but I have been pregnant - in total - for 3.5 years of my life. I don't need/want their look.
- Sudocrem on spots. Arse. Literally.
- Argan Oil - Yes it's wonderful but it doesn't have to be in everything - and please stop calling it groundbreaking.
- Painting your ring finger differently from the others. A trend not started by someone with OCD. Clearly.
- The word 'trend'. Forever.
- Aapri Face Scrubs. I am still asked if they are 'ok to use'. Yes, on the sole of an elephant's foot.
- The term 'squeaky clean'. Nothing on your body should squeak. You are not a rodent.
You?
I love you Caroline.
ReplyDeleteI love YOU Jayne. :)
DeleteWhat about Vaseline?! (eurgh) x
ReplyDeleteGood point.
DeleteI love you. THE END.
ReplyDeleteAh shucks you sweet talker you.
DeleteI wish the entire Kardashian family would just move on full stop. I wish my acne would shove off. I also wish my excess weight would magically move on all of its own accord whilst I still continue to trough my way through Waitroses cake selection. I'm not sure I've got the hang of this...
ReplyDeleteI hear you. It's ok. Vent away..
DeleteMade me laugh...esp re the pregnancies and Argan oil. I love it too but it seems to be overkill.
ReplyDeleteI know. Everywhere!
DeleteHilarious. I too hate the signature finger nail paint. Just wrong. Oh and the metallic/magnet/caviar etc nail varnishes. Hideous. And onesies but ill probably be shot for saying that one.
ReplyDeleteXx
I like the velvet nails. But leaving one different? No.
DeleteHahaha brilliant. xx
ReplyDeleteThis actually made me laugh out loud! Thank you!
ReplyDeletehttp://golddustk.blogspot.co.uk/
x
Emu oil- not a fan! Oilatum (hate) steroid cream on already thin *damaged* skin the new *fur* manicure F-ur-k off! Ok, that will doodle do :) Love your rants in a list-the best x Oh Bio oil- VILE!
ReplyDeleteFurk off. Genius.
DeleteToo funny :)
ReplyDeleteI love this. Love, love, love.
ReplyDelete"Guys" - all of the time. No, no , no.
ReplyDelete"Like" - it is or it isn't - it's, like, very annoying.
"Picked up" - you purchased something. "Picked up" implies theft.
I like totally hear you.
Delete- Taking pictures for one's blog with one's hand stuck into one side of one's ombre'd hair whilst pouting and gazing slightly off camera or at one's turned-in feet.
ReplyDelete- Ombre hair.
- Mac Snob lipstick (not necessarily an everyday occurrence but one which should be banished to Room 101 nevertheless).
- Piers Morgan. Just because...well. Because.
*bows*
DeleteLove the first one... Can't even begin to imagine who that's about!
DeleteI unfollowed someone on Instagram recently for doing number 1... I think it may be the person you're alluding to actually!!
DeleteTell it PP, tell it!
DeleteOmbre hair looks like bad roots people!
DeleteEffing "top-knots" .... please.
ReplyDeleteLOVE this, yet another gem from Mrs Hirons
xx
I have a top knot. 'Cept it's a bun. :)
DeleteDitto.... Buns r fine... They can stay ;-) xx
DeleteDitto ... Buns r good, they can stay ;-)
DeleteI dont know the difference between a top knot and a bun but my bun ain't going nowhere.
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteNo 1) Christmas chocolates. Still got a houseful and now getting fat
ReplyDeleteNo 2) the word yay
No 3) sticking `tastic` on the end of words. I did this myself today and died a little inside
No 4) people trying to buy me skincare as a gift. Done with good intentions but nooooooo. If you've heard of it I don't want it! (My family don't read your blog Caroline)
There maybe more...
and bad use of the English language...`maybe` instead of `may be`
DeleteEspecially on Facebook.
I forgot 'yummy'. I hate yummy.
DeleteI said amazeballs the other day and instantly wanted to extract my own vocal cords
DeleteHow can I explain to my friend how much she needs to stop putting Sudocrem on her face. It makes me want to punch her every time her stupid white face appears at my door!! x
ReplyDeleteWait: she wears it out of the house?
DeleteNo way!
DeleteDitto to all of the above.
ReplyDeleteI find sudocrem really soothing after using my aapri scrub... *ahem*
ReplyDelete1) Top Knots (agreed)
2) People saying 'sneaky peak'. it's sneaky PEEK!!!!!!!!!
3) Rodial and everything associated thereof
This Sneaky Peak into your psyche has been revealing :)
DeleteWhat, no Sudocrem on spots? I hadn't even had the time to try this one? And I'll keep painting my nails different colors, sorry :))
ReplyDeleteI'm a bit scared by onesies for grown-ups, but well, to each their own thing. As long as you don't offer me one as a gift.
*buys you onesie, paints nails all one colour* :)
DeleteAbsolutely Brill, That has made my day!! x
ReplyDeletesomething should squeak though halloumi in your mouth - yum squeaky cheese rules! I can believe anybody would even dream of putting Aapri on their face I use smoother scrubs than that on my body :) great post as always thanks for raising a smile x
ReplyDeleteGrilled halloumi. Nom.
DeleteI used Aapri alllll through my teenage years, and wondered why I had terrible skin. Ah the joys of being grown up, better off and way more selective!
DeleteThis gave me a laugh! I totally agree about squeaky clean - you shouldn't squeak!
ReplyDeleteThings that we need to move on from/things that are totally out for me:
1) Unnatural eyebrows a la filled in so much, they look like a geometric shape. Ew.
2) The use of highlighter all over the cheeks. It's supposed to go on the TOP of your cheekbones.
3) Pouts. Just, no.
Pouts. No.
DeleteAhhhh, the brow that is square at the bridge of the nose, god I hate that!
DeleteTotally agree on pouts! Having said that I look like a bufoon when I smile in blog pics and for some reason my face seems to want to pout!
Love, love, love. I have NEVER been into the whole different polish for the ring finger thing, it just looks unbalanced. I am OCD. Proud of it. Bring an end to this "trend", Caroline.
ReplyDelete*shoots self*
DeleteI had to test the caviar trend and couldn't be faffed to do all of my nails so did the 'accent' nail. lasted less than 6 hours before I took it all off!
DeleteI just love your sense of humor! Brilliant! :)
ReplyDeleteI just love your sense of humor! Brilliant and you're so right!
ReplyDeleteGosh couldn't agree more to all the points you just mentioned. Where would the world be without you Caroline :-). x
ReplyDeleteRaves 'nd Ramblings
wow, you're angry
ReplyDeleteThis? Meh. Just a mini rant.
Deletehere's what annoys me: people bragging about pregnancy
ReplyDeleteBest you don't read any of that then eh?
DeleteI'm slightly scared of you Caroline but enjoyed your rant. When is part 2 to be vented? :)
ReplyDeleteI'm lovely! The only people that need to be scared of me are people who take advantage of other people and prople who do nothing to help others.
DeleteSo most politicians.
:) x
TOWIE, Made In Chelsea and any other very dodgy reality TV 'programmes' and any celeb TV 'programmes'. So over that rubbish!
ReplyDeleteI have and always will hate the word 'nice' its non decriptive, it's like they can't be bothered to think of anything constructive to say but don't want to be mean.
ReplyDeletepure genius!!! almost had a twitter arguement the other night about sudocrem, I was defending your school of thought, obv!
ReplyDeleteJade | Beauty Butterfly Blog
x
I wouldn't use it on my baby's bum let alone my face!
DeleteHey Caroline!
ReplyDeleteThe apricot scrub on the elephants foot made my day! Thank you for sharing. You inspire me to keep being me!
xo
karen in oz
oh and by the way, i'm over the use of the word 'super' before any word & TOWIE!!! No need for either in this world!
ReplyDeletedon't you ever get like, super excited about a super product that made you super beautiful!
DeleteHey Caroline,
ReplyDeleteJust discovered your blog and me and mum are already hooked, keep up the good work :) Anyways im after a face scrub if you could recommend me one that would be super, in the pass ive used the st ives scrub "/ is that a bad scrub to be using oh i have rather oily..ish skin xx
Hey Caroline!
ReplyDeleteThe apricot scrub on the elephants foot made my day! Thank you for sharing. You inspire me to keep being me!
xo
karen in oz
Oh gosh I remember using the aapri scrub years ago and it broke me out horribly, lots of little under the skin red spots all over my face. It was awful! I don't really like it when bloggers adress their readers as 'sweeties' or 'honeys' etc I find it a wee bit sickly and contrived, or maybe I'm just a miserable cow :)
ReplyDeletex
Claps lots, me too! I just say readers, if I say anything nice at all haha
DeleteOh thank god, I just read this to Ian, hopefully he'll stop coming to bed looking like Casper the friendly ghost every night xx
ReplyDeleteThis was wonderful. I'd like to add some too:
ReplyDelete* 24hr wear foundations- really!!! Why would anyone want foundation on their face for 24 hrs???
* ad campaigns with words like "millionize your lashes"- huh? Millionize???
* get four shades fairer in just a week!!! - what do I say about this? These creams are so popular in India. I just feel like shaking the person buying it and saying, hello, if this really worked, no one would be dark. And we'd have women walking around with faces four shades fairer than their bodies *shudder*!
1. People who have amazing lives where they are partying forever (ie, hardly anyone)
Delete2. agree!
3. Why the obsession with white? What is so amazing about a Caucasian that people would use bleach or heaven knows what else to get that skin colour. I think every ethnicity has lovely skin and its the skin you inherited through years of blood and genes.
You are brilliant. One that is annoying me is all these crazy nail trends. Enough already, I will not wear fur on my nails. x
ReplyDeleteyeah, what must it look like after washing your hands?!
DeleteEvery woman should have a trench coat in their wardrobe. FFS I am 5ft 4, size 12 with big t**s, and I look like a sack of spuds tied in the middle if I wear one (not that I have done so for many years)!
ReplyDeleteAmen!
DeleteThis is what gets on my wick- huge corporate companies a la Estee Lauder donating a percentage of their profits to charites such as breast cancer yet they are the one that have been known to include some of the 'questinable ingredients' that cause this type of cancer in the first place. Geeta
ReplyDeleteI read this and thought about the sudocream I put on the spot that wont go away last night and the Argen oil that is currently in my hair yet totally agreed with everything you said haha
ReplyDeleteWe all have our bug bearers, mine has to be bloggers on twitter who want followers yet all they do is moan! I've unfollowed two this week alone! haha
x
Argan oil started for hair products (I have a few) and now its insane and in everything!
Deleteha ha this made me giggle x
ReplyDeleteLove your post. I know how you feel.
ReplyDeleteThe phrase 'gifted' mostly used by fashion bloggers sets my teeth on edge. Your shoes have a talent, no they were either free or a gift, not gifted.
ReplyDeleteLove this.
DeleteI'm with you on painting one of your nails a different colour to the rest and the word trend. The term 'on trend' in particular makes me wince. Using the word 'statement' to describe a bright lipstick or a bit of jewellery from Topshop or painting one of your nails a different colour to the rest bothers me too. You're not really making that much of a statement in society with any of those things - except that you bought them or have the time to paint one of your nails a different colour to the rest.
ReplyDeleteyou know what's worse? BANG on trend
DeleteI can't stand using the word gift as a verb either. Why would you?
ReplyDeleteTotally agree with the ring finger thing. I am so fed up with this 'trend'......copy cats!
ReplyDeleteAmen sistah.
ReplyDelete"natural" skincare - whatever that means - so is poison ivy.
creme de la mer addicts which smears worse than expensive smooth peanut butter
Parisian women who think they can get away with orange-red lipstick and disheveled hair and no foundation - no one can.
I can't be doing with the word 'natural' anymore.
DeleteHahaha! You can probably hear me laughing all the way from America. I love how honest and no frills you are.
ReplyDeleteSO much love for your blog,
Lindsay
Thank you!
DeleteHahaha!. Love this post. Said the same thing to my hubby about the celebrity pregnancies. Expect glossies to go wild for maternity fashion the year.
ReplyDeleteMaternity fashion? Oh GOD.
DeleteHahaha, love this. Love your straight forward style.I am sick of not having sun, I need some sun for crying out loud. And the Kardashians.
ReplyDeleteSorry to be so off topic, but I have a question. Do you have any idea why I feel my cheeks burning after applying LA Roche-Posay moisturizer for sensitive dehydrated skin? Afterwards I can see these redness coming up on my cheeks and I have no idea why, I mean the reason I bought it was because it was for sensitive skin. Anyway, I would appreciate a good (not so expensive) moisturizer that doesn't burn. It's the first time it's happening to me and to be honest I never paid 16 pounds for a moisturizer before.
It clearly doesn't agree with you. Switch it out to something else. Do you have anything really bland and plain?
DeleteI had previously used Naked 12h skin aid so I still had some left and I started using that one again, my skin seems to like it. La Roche-Posay-obvious dissapointment.
DeleteScouse brows, don't forget that one! Briliant post x
ReplyDeleteI'm a scouser. How very dare you. *combs brow* :)
DeleteOh gosh, I'm sorry! :) x
DeleteHahah! This Bioderma phase that never seems to end is what's getting on my nerves! There will be a point where you need to put something on your face that has a little bit more to it than just that, yes its good, please move on. I still love Sudocrem though :p haha.
ReplyDeleteBioblurgh? :)
DeleteI have just had to google Bioderma as clearly I missed something!
DeleteSeriously enjoyed this - TOTALLY agree RE apricot face scrub. I used it ONCE when a friend recommended it to me when I was about 13 and found it horrible for my poor skin.
ReplyDeletewww.bombayrose.co.uk
Ambi xx
Love you SO much xx
ReplyDelete*snogs*
DeleteI want "text speak" to move on. "Txt spk" should be a criminal offence because it's criminal what they've done with the English Language.
ReplyDeleteInnit bruv.
DeleteWell, I must say, i had absolutely no idea about the one finger nail varnish trend as i generally live under a rock. But I did get served by a man in a shop last year who had said nail painted blue and it actually disturbed me for the rest of the weekend! As it was in an art shop, I hoped it was paint, but I went back again to collect my order the following week and...STILL BLUE! Can't believe it's "a thing." Bad.
ReplyDeleteUggs. I wish we could all move on from Uggs.
ReplyDeleteWhen is the next Clinic? I have quite a few clinic-y questions I am dying to ask you.
funny post. Talking about annoying phrases can I just add that it makes me cringe when people say I got in "on sale". If you were brought up in UK we say "in the sale". It's one of the Americanisms that set my teeth on edge when said by non Americans. Just remembered also someone I know who, instead of saying "from the start" has started saying "from the get-go". Hmmm.
ReplyDeleteMicellar water. It stings my eyes and it isn't fun.
ReplyDelete"Long lasting" lipstick that doesn't last through a cup of tea
BABY OIL!
(putting through twice as i'm not sure it went through the first time)
Girls who consistently cock their head to one side, and do Duck Face into the camera should be banished from Instagram forever.
ReplyDeleteduck face is evil, that Flannagan girl from Corrie and I'm a Celeb will be shown as an example to my daughter of how to NEVER look when she is a teenager
DeleteBanish these two words please:
ReplyDelete1. Nomnomnom. ( even writing it down makes me sick)
2. ' ha!' Please stop saying/writing that: so childlike.
Love you! You re a scrooge, like me :)
Big mouth, big heart!
Amen to the first one- women are pregnant all the time? That's why we're all here. Congrats - but yes- move on people! Great list! I had a friend send me Sudocrem (as we dont have it in the US) thought it would work- I have the worst chest acne (sorry for the TMI) Now trying mario badescu drying lotion.
ReplyDelete